Zumbaaaaaaa

I grew quite bored of the gym lately and as I don’t want to turn into a fat slob, I figured I should shake up my fitness routine. Enter……Zumba!

I’ll start off with the positives. The music is unreal! They really know how to use the bass in the gyms over here and I felt like I was in a club (Side note, wearing gym clothes to a club would be really comfy). There were people of all ages there, which is pretty cool that a class can cater for and be enjoyed by everyone. It really is a great way to get in cardio without realising it and less like a  ‘my legs are burning right now’ spin class.

Here comes the negatives. There no easy way to say this, but I’m pretty sure Zumba is part of a cult. I’ve had three different teachers for each class I’ve had and each has been more insane than the last. Drugs is the only reasonable explanation for the level of energy and excitement that they emit! Now I love a bit of crazy dancing as much as the next person, but holy crap this was insane! I stopped halfway through one dance, folded my arms like a stroppy toddler and refused to try and do a routine that an experienced Bollywood dancer would have struggled with.

Those around me were oblivious to the insanity of the teacher. Instead, one had her eyes closed during most of it and just did her own thing, which involved a lot of swishy-arm moves. Respect. The one to the left of me believed she was full-on in a J Lo video, complete with ‘fierce’ facial expressions and head movements. If only J Lo wore Gap pants, had red hair and was 50.

I don’t think Irish people are made for Zumba. We’re brought up to do Irish dancing with arms and hips straight. I remember when Riverdance first came out and people were enraged by the fact that Michael Flatley moved his arms, how dare he! When I try some of the movements, I look like a Giraffe having an epileptic fit. Even the teacher laughed at me at one stage!

However the weird thing is that I laughed back and continued on. It’s impossible to care how embarrassing you are when you’re surrounded by music blaring upbeat tunes and everyone around you doesn’t care what you look like.

As cults go, it could be worse. I get a good workout, pretend-fulfil my childhood dream of being a back-up dancer and I don’t have to pretend to like Tom Cruise.